The truth about dressing for your body shape

It seems like style advice on how to dress for your body shape has been around for as long as I can remember and is one of the first things many women learn about when it comes to the art of looking good.

When you Google how to dress for your body type, you'll find all sorts of articles sharing information like:

"Dressing well is about creating balance and dressing proportionately."

"Learning to dress for your body shape can help you choose clothes that flatter your body and highlight your best features."

And, of course, that draws you in - who doesn't want to learn how to find clothes that fit and flatter them, show off their best features and balance their proportions?! It sounds like the perfect solution to your style woes.

But there's one glaring error that's overlooked…

Dressing for your body type is based on a flawed system

Who determined what's considered a 'flattering' look in the first place? Who decided what the best features are on each of these shapes? Who decreed that only balanced proportions look good? Whose advice are you actually following when it comes to dressing for your body shape?

The answer is: society. Or rather, and even more disturbingly, the patriarchal influence on society.

What is considered flattering, proportional and a woman's best features is set by society's ideal body type for women.

In a world of messaging built on the male gaze, the ideal body type is unfortunately not decided by women. (If it was, I'm pretty sure we'd all be walking around proud of our curves, cellulite, stretch marks and loose skin. Just sayin'.)

“When you read articles that show you how to fit and flatter your body shape, what you’re really being shown is how to use clothes to change your body shape to look like one specific body shape that society (and more specifically the male gaze) has decreed is the ideal - an hourglass. 🤯”

Yep. The subliminal message is "learn your body shape so you can change it to look how society thinks you should look in order to be considered an attractive female."

If you've ever followed the typical advice of dressing for your body type and found that you liked the way you look, this is why!

It's because you're now closer to the ideal body shape and therefore being received more positively by others in a society that views the hourglass figure as the ideal beauty standard.

The most insidious part of this whole system is how it's universally accepted that changing how you look is the answer, when what really needs changing are society's unrealistic standards.

Let's break it down even more with an example - you've gotta see it to believe it!

Say you're a triangle (also called a pear) body shape, meaning you carry weight in your lower half, your waist is wider than your bust and your shoulders are narrow in comparison to your hips.

The typical advice you'll find for dressing a triangle body shape is:

• Wear pieces on the top half that accentuate your shoulders or bust areas and wear pieces on the bottom half that minimize attention to the lower part of your body.

• Wear tops that draw the eye upward and highlight your waist, neckline and shoulders. (Ie, your best features.)

• The trick to dressing a pear body type is wearing anything that adds to your shoulder and bust area. This adds focus to your upper body to even out the proportions between your top and bottom half.

When you follow this advice and 'even out your proportions,' you've created an illusion with clothes so that your body shape now looks like this:

And, hmm, doesn't that look an awful lot like another body shape that just so happens to be the ideal? 🧐

Well, look at that. Turns out you haven't embraced your shape at all. You've changed it.

Furthermore, why do your fuller booty, hips and thighs need to be minimized? Why can't they be the center of attention and highlighted as your best feature? If you were truly embracing your body, that might be exactly what you want to do!

What dressing for your body shape has actually shown you how to do?

Change your body so you can look how society thinks you should look in order to be considered attractive.

It's such total BS right?!

It's time to take back your power and try a different approach to dressing for your body shape.

How to dress to embrace your natural body shape

Ditch the outdated idea of dressing to flatter your body. 

Fun fact - to flatter means to lavish insincere praise so it's no wonder that dressing to 'flatter' your body shape is based on creating an illusion that doesn't actually exist.

Any compliments you receive won't be based on what your body actually looks like - which just adds fuel to the body shaming fire.

Start dressing to embrace your body.

Embrace means to accept willingly, enthusiastically and completely.

In other words, go ahead and wear whatever the heck you want and allow your body to look exactly the way it naturally looks.

To dip your toe in the water:

Notice the running commentary of body shape advice that goes through your head while you decide what to wear.

Then flash a giant STOP sign in your mind. Once it's clear, replace the dressing for your body shape thoughts with "what am I loving right now?" and let that run through your head as you pick your outfit.

To go all in:

Let the commentary run and experiment with purposely putting something on that you feel makes you look heavier, bigger, (whatever a personal trigger is for you) and then wear it anyway.

You'll probably have a voice shouting in your head that your thighs look huge and you need to change immediately. That's a good time to remind yourself where that voice is coming from and what it's trying to get you to do - change how your natural body looks as if your original shape isn't good enough. Say what now?! Infuriating, right?! 😡

(At this point, I personally find that getting angry at the BS nonsensical rules women have been force fed about our looks usually shuts it up and I can go about my day.)

When you ditch the dressing for your body shape advice once and for all, it unlocks a whole new, level of personal style based on empowerment. You begin dressing to embrace who you are and what you look like so you can let your natural beauty shine.

And doesn't that sound like a much more beautiful, loving and kind way to exist in this world?

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ABOUT:

I'm a Minneapolis personal stylist on a mission to eradicate outdated style 'rules' so women can unleash themselves in all their beautiful, authentic glory!

I offer personal styling services that empower women to wear what they love by helping them ditch any outdated style rules keeping them stuck, showing them how to dress in a way that embraces their beautiful body and, the key to it all, having fun! I believe in a liberated style approach so there are no style rules, body shapes, seasonal colors or dos and don’ts given out here. Rather, I help my clients tap into what lights them up and dress with the purpose of expressing their authentic selves rather than impressing others.

This is all done through a combination of styling services (including wardrobe edits, shopping trips and styling sessions) available in thoughtfully curated styling packages designed to help clients unleash their true self through the power of style.

When I'm not helping women take back their power style, you can find me reading (about a gazillion books at once), learning the art of pole dancing, making & decorating cakes, binging a random circa 2000's TV show with my hubby, Aaron, while playing with my adorable rescue pup or, of course, shopping! :-)